“Consistency is contrary to nature, contrary to life. The only completely consistent people are the dead.”
Consistent: constantly adhering to the same course. And I’m beginning to wonder whether true consistency truly exists. It seems that people spend so much time and energy working toward consistency, toward a place where life finally remains the same. Things are going well, you’re on the right track. And then suddenly your hard achieved road that has been smooth and consistent suddenly becomes full of bumps and turns.
Consistency. Is it out there?
If I look back on my life I honestly would have to say that there is no such thing as real, true, lasting consistency. Just when I get to a place where I start to feel comfortable, where I start to relax…it never lasts. I finish my A.S. degree. Start to adjust to not being in school. Then life takes a turn and I’m back in school again. Klayton has a job, it lasts for a few months. Now he has another one, another employer, another schedule. And while I’m thankful that he has work, some consistency to it would be nice. Ah! There is that word again. Ok, so it’s gotta get better right? But just when we seem to settle is just when things begin to change. Our consistency always seems to be contingent on work and school. You step out in faith and try something new, and it’s not the right leap, or it is but it was only meant to be temporary (if only I had known)…Like a stepping stone from one thing to another. So I plan on starting grad school, but all of those plans fall by the way. If only I could consistently stay in school. And just when you adjust to having one kid…along comes another. You go from one employer to another, and another, and another, and another…
Consistency? Are you out there?
Looking back I begin to wonder, was life ever meant to be consistent? My head answers yes in a second’s time. But my heart whispers a different answer. And I don’t mean to complain about my life. But I do wonder, it consistency too much to ask for?
It’s hard to travel on a road that’s ever-changing. You feel like you’ve just started to catch your breath, and suddenly it’s all uphill again. It’s hard to see the thing you crave the most falling by the way. And you’re forced to continue on, not knowing what’s ahead, not knowing what you should do, wishing for what’s behind.
But you can’t stand still on the road which is life.
And so the part of the road that’s straight and smooth and consistent only lasts for a while. Because the good, consistent things aren’t meant to remain forever.
The consistency always seems to leave at the most inopportune time. Last time Klayton had a major job change I was eight months pregnant with Ellie. He had a few, ok, maybe more than a few more job changes at other stressful time: like when Ellie was teething, or I went back to work, or I started another class. Now another change seems inevitable and again, I am eight months pregnant.
It’s hard not to become frustrated and depressed with the circumstances that surround. It seems like you can never get ahead. Never find a way to be perfectly comfortable. I’ve had my little pitty party and my moments of anger and bewilderment.
The consistency just isn’t there.
And I want it to be.
But it’s in those moments of frustration that the Quiet Voice begins to whisper. And suddenly you remember that true consistency does exist. Not in life. No. I believe that life was never mean to be consistent. And it never will be. But there is consistency in my life.
“And He is before all things, and in Him all things consist.” Colossians 1:17
Perhaps life was never meant to be consistent in order for us to seek out the One who is consistency Himself.
So I can rest quiet in the peace of this truth. Knowing that no matter how bumpy, windy, uphill, and changing the road ahead is, He who is Consistency is leading me on. And the consistency that He provides will be enough. It always has been, and always will be. Even if I haven’t liked all of the details of the road called life, He has consistently provided, consistently given peace, consistently turned bad into good, consistently cared.
Ellie, I pray that some day you realize that life is not meant to be consistent. Don’t waste your time seeking consistency on your own. You will never find it. Only God is true consistency. Trust in Him. Trust Him to be your consistency, and to guide you and be your consistency on the road called life.
Trials will come and trials will go. Times of rest will fade away. People will enter this world and leave it. Good times exist, but not forever. This is the reality of life. People were not meant to be consistent. Life was not mean to be consistent. So look to Him who is Consistency himself. And when when it seems as if all hope for a consistent life has gone away, remember, He is before all things, and in Him all things consist.